Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize