Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
