Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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