Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Randomize
Follow @tfln