I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
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