i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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