i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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