Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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