i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Text me some of your sweat
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
