My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize