Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Randomize