we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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