i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
