All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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