Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Randomize
