If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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