You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
