Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
