I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
