Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
So much Jack, so little girl.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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