Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Randomize
