apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
