I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
