STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
