I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
