my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
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I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
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Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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