is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
