Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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