Kiss
Puke
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
