I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Text me some of your sweat
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
