Do you still have your period?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
he puts the penis in happiness.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
