Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
