I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
