she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
