nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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