Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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