just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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