You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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