windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
