Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
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"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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