i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
you traded sex for a burrito?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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