Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
love makes seman taste better
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Randomize
