i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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