I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Randomize