Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
