You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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