I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize