I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
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