Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
