My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
She made me pour olive oil on her.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
