This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize