Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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