Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize